Oh God...

If you need and excuse to get angrier than you are already about the indiscriminate slaughter in the Middle East, you need look no further than the American evangelical movement.

It seems that the deaths of women and children are bringing us one step closer to the return of Jesus (this time to be played by David Hasslehoff). The end times are here folks, don't bother stocking up on the food or hiding in the cellar - it won't do you any good!

Take your protien pills and put your helmet on, the (C)rapture is upon us and all the Christians (except Mel Gibson who I predict will convert to Judaism shortly before his next movie "Mad Mav") will float off to heaven like a blow-up doll caught in an upsurge of hot air.

In order for the rapture to happen, from what I can gather, we need Israel and Hezbollah to blow the crap out of civilians in order for the Iranians to get seriously involved. Once they are involved, the USA and Israel will start blowing the crap out of Iran but the Iranians will be saved by a one-world army led by Russia and the European Union.

At this point a European Anti-Christ will rule the world for 3 and a half years before Jesus decides enough is enough and returns to Earth in a puff of smoke like Ziggy Stardust. He'll then save all the Christians and a few Jews who are given the chance to convert. The rest of us are up chocolate creek without a popsicle stick!

He also opens a Starbucks in Miami and makes a dirty video with Paris Hilton but that comes later.

No I am not making this up, well okay, he doesn't shag Paris Hilton, but people really do believe the other shite, you can read about it here.

If the loss of innocent lives wasn't so tragic and if the President of the country with all the bombs wasn't one of these armageddon-fixated freaks, then we could all have a good laugh! Unfortunately this is not the case.

George Bush sent his support to a recent conference of Christian-Zionists who gathered in Washington to support Israel with the expressed belief that they are helping us all towards paradise. Oh God....