Saturday, January 17, 2009

The beginning of the end (Thank god).

I promised myself I would never write about the weather. Writing about the weather is like a stand-up comic starting his performance with "A funny thing happened to me on the way to the theater...", it's boring and has been done a million times before.

Well, today, I am going to write about the weather.

Holy fucknuts it's cold outside.

Some parts of Maine are hitting 50 degrees below zero, and here in the tri-state area we are at 12 below as I type this. Last night on my way home from work it was colder than that still.

Let me try to describe what this weather feels like. It is so cold it burns. Any exposed skin feels like it is going to peel off once you have been out in it for more than 15 minutes. Your eyes tear up but the tears freeze before they leave your tear ducts. It feels like someone is pressing on your eyes and sinuses with their thumbs.

The bus took 20 minutes to come and I was dancing at the bus stop like the old dancing baby screensaver and probably looking just as creepy. So it goes....

It's the last weekend of the Bush Administration. Can you believe that? Nothing makes me feel warm and fuzzy like the thought that I will never have to put up with those evangelical loonies again anytime soon.

Unless of course my recurring nightmare comes true. On Monday night, the day before Obama's inauguration, Dick Cheney is going to roll into Washington on top of a tank and martial law will be declared "in the interests of economic security". President Dick will then declare himself president for life and the country will be partitioned into 2 areas - "Jesusland" and "Prisoncamp". Pick your place but get it right because there are no born again felons.

Hold the nightmare. Roll on Tuesday.

Here's a song for the weather and Dubya

and a song for Obama


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home